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Are You Alone Or Are You Lonely?

December 8th 2006 13:39
It is said often. "We are social animals" and that is why a sense of community is so valued and important. I am cetainly not in a position to dispute these contentions. I do fear that many individuals become "lonely" because they have not learned how to be alone. And how tragic, since it is when one is alone that one can experience the true value and benefit of solitude.

The simple question here, then, is--

DO YOU KNOW HOW TO BE ALONE, OR DOES IT BECOME LONLINESS?


deorre



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Comment by Soleil

December 8th 2006 17:37
I think for some people, it's a tribalistic instinct to be part of something, to be part of a group, to be part of anything.
Some people just can't stand being on their own.

However, you can also feel alone and/or perhaps loneliness even if you're surrounded by a lot of people ... no?

Yes, some people have to learn the joy of being alone and taking time to reflect.
IMO, being alone does not equate loneliness.

Comment by Deorre

December 8th 2006 17:45
I agree, soleil. Many default into group activity. And, it is absolutely possible to feel alone in a crowd. That probably translates into lonliness--inability to connect or something.

I clearly need my alone itme. I value it.

Comment by Lilla

December 9th 2006 05:56
Deorre,

... alone time to me is paramount to breathing...lots and lots of it, too... I'm certainly never lonely within it, that's for sure... I think I'm lonelier at parties and family do's - even places like orble - sometimes...certainly within certain relationships in my life...

.. in my book, solitude does not equate to loneliness at all...

Lilla...

Comment by Deorre

December 9th 2006 13:35
If I were to sift it all out, Lilla, I think I too prefer solitude to all the social activity. It can seem very lonely in some of those crowds.

And what can be truly special is to share time and space with another who is equally comfortable in solitude.

Comment by Lilla

December 10th 2006 07:23
hmmm, that takes time and skill...if at all..

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