Being Or Becoming Single
April 27th 2007 16:37
Oh me, oh my. The plight of being or becoming single can and often is a daunting experience. We are, after all, social animals and thusly need to be with. The standard format of being with in the adult world is to mate and have a spouse. To love and cherish, forever and beyond.
Aight?
So many rue the reality of being alone. Being single. They crave and yearn for a partner to be with. To sex with. To spend time and grow together, with. Some, in fact, desire this so much that they are willing to alter how they act and who they are just to make them more likely to find someone.
And then they do, and the castle is built of sand, and sooner or later, the storm and tides fluctuate and the castle becomes WAAAAY DIFFERENT.
I have found in my professional as well as personal life that finding peace with the possibility of being single, alone, for the rest of life is the best way to attract another. Or others. Paradoxical, that.
Yet, quite reasonable. Only when one gets clear and satisfied with whom one is, and begins to live the life with that comfort level, will others who find that particular life attractive fall into place. Then, relationships based upon who one truly is can emerge.
How satisfying can that be?
Are you comfortable and at peace with the possibility of being single for the rest of your life?
deorre
Aight?
So many rue the reality of being alone. Being single. They crave and yearn for a partner to be with. To sex with. To spend time and grow together, with. Some, in fact, desire this so much that they are willing to alter how they act and who they are just to make them more likely to find someone.
And then they do, and the castle is built of sand, and sooner or later, the storm and tides fluctuate and the castle becomes WAAAAY DIFFERENT.
I have found in my professional as well as personal life that finding peace with the possibility of being single, alone, for the rest of life is the best way to attract another. Or others. Paradoxical, that.
Yet, quite reasonable. Only when one gets clear and satisfied with whom one is, and begins to live the life with that comfort level, will others who find that particular life attractive fall into place. Then, relationships based upon who one truly is can emerge.
How satisfying can that be?
Are you comfortable and at peace with the possibility of being single for the rest of your life?
deorre
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Comment by Nickoftime's Sanity Corner
good question...being recently single myself (lived with someone for 5 years up until 6 months ago), I don't really think I'd like the prospect all that much...humans ARE social animals, that statement is absolutely correct!
The need to "be" with another is in our genes..but natural selection doesn't always work all that well for us humans..
I can't see myself single the rest of my life...but, once burned, twice? I'M just fairly STUPID! lol We'll havta see what I get for my Birthday lolol it's coming up soon and I've hinted around about Angelina Jolie...
Ahhh to sleep perchance to dream! *snicker*
Great post!
Take care,
Nick
Comment by katyzzz
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I'm not after Angelina Jolie or rather her male counterpart, whoever that is.
I think when one is young we have a lot of choice.
I also think that 'fear of commitment' or having too much damn choice keeps the young from being happy, nowadays.
I'd love ,once again, to have a male partner, and despite what you say I think we all have to adapt in some ways for any relationship to be successful.
I keep my eyes open now, and continue to be friendly with the opposite sex. I don't actually agree with your concepts, although I understand what you are saying.
I think some people are hopeless with relationships and they will have to adjust, one can wait forever.
Action, is required.
But, a good post.
katyzzz...I'm quite comfortable in my own skin, so to speak.
Comment by Deorre
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Comment by Deorre
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As much as I like to play in the sand...
Comment by Nickoftime's Sanity Corner
oh sure, in fact any nice cute decent gal with a great sense of humor and a pretty smile would be welcomed! lol
Take care,
Nick
Comment by Stanley
i for one do enjoy my single status because there are just so many damn delicious women at university but on the flip side a relationship is nice too and definitely has its benefits.
hmm quite a rambling comment i left here that is a bit all over the place. haha.
Comment by D. Armenta
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I completely agree, you have to be happy with yourself first.
After that, it is much easier to compromise with others.
First things first.
Comment by Deorre
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Maybe.
Agreed, D., what better does any of us have to offer another but ourself?
Comment by Nickoftime's Sanity Corner
single can suck if you're a guy like me who loves to love, be in love and get love in return...
Right now I'm single after a five year in depth relationship...and after five years you get "used" to having someone around all the time...to hold hands with, to have sex with, to ANYTHING with....
And when that connection is broken and the ship sails outta port, it can devastate you...
I've always been happy with who I am, and the kinda person I am....but, I also hate bein alone all the time...I'm a social animal too...
We don't do well when we isolate....I know I don't...but I've since retaught myself to re-THINK the way my mind operates...
I stopped "looking" and just said to hell with it...if someone comes along ok, if not oh well...live for yourself, and things can only get better....
And now, finally, they are!
Take care,
Nick
Comment by Deorre
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Maybe I'm kind of F'ed up.